It’s always an interesting test of truth when you cross your own personal bridge of health and decision making. The times when I become the patient!
To be honest I have always kept an open mind as I never want my own determination/stubbornness/ignorance/apparent professional know-how to act against me. Sometimes I am the patient! And sometimes I feel vulnerable, overwhelmed and scared and need other health practitioners to coach me through.
Last year I had a few gynae issues that could have gone real sour really quick.
Did they change the way I have been living my life in the last 10 months? Absolutely.
Clearing clutter and putting myself was paramount
It started last year when I discovered I had a “mass” on one of my ovaries. This co-incided with no periods. An ultrasound revealed a big mass (bigger than a normal ovary – so that freaked me out) and was suspicious. The report came back from the ultrasound place and next thing I was off to see a gynae. My gynaecologist is someone I respect and believe to be the best on the Gold Coast and possibly one of the best in Australia. He was my obsterician for my first baby, and I have seen him on and off for years as a client and in a professional capacity as I refer my clients to him. I have HUGE respect for him and his skills.
So with that in mind, I was faced with a challenge. Did I believe I could reverse the ovary mass on my own?
The information I had was that it was a mass, didn’t have an oversupply of blood (so unlikely to be cancer). I told him I would like 6 weeks to reverse it on my own.
I made HEALTH my highest priority.
I knew if I didn’t that this could become cancerous and I may not be around in 12 months for my kids. So I made a massive commitment to do everything I talk about on stage, tell my clients to do and have read about. I walked away from stress, I went on holidays, I ate better than I ever have, I meditated more.
7 weeks later I went in for my follow-up ultrasound and it had gone! No period for 90 days, and a massive scare and the “mass” had resolved.
Phew relief, sigh… so I thought until he suggested we do a routine pap smear. “OK” I said.
I didn’t expect it to be bad. But it was. It came back as CIN 2.
CIN stands for Cervical Intra-epithelial Neoplasia and is a grading system used to describe cervical cells. The cells of your cervix should be uniform and elongated but if they are becoming mutated/pre-cancerous they lose uniformity and change shape.
According to this site (ref http://www.cancer.gov/publications/dictionaries/cancer-terms?cdrid=543119) “.. CIN 2 is not cancer, but may become cancer and spread to nearby normal tissue if not treated. Treatment for CIN 2 may include cryotherapy, laser therapy, loop electrosurgical procedure (LEEP), or cone biopsy to remove or destroy the abnormal tissue. CIN 2 is sometimes called high-grade or moderate dysplasia…”
So whilst not cancerous my doctor colleague proceeded to tell me that he had a woman with it last week, who had gone onto have cervical cancer. And it wasn’t looking good for her. But once again I was determined to back myself on what I had read and believe my body could overcome this – actually CONQUER was the word I related to. I was going to beat this and conquer it and bring my body back to normal.
I already had read (when I was researching a controversial blog on the merits of gardasil), that folic acid over 12 months reverses most cervical cell changes and this was going to be my main strategy.
Once again he wanted me back in 6 weeks, but I wanted 6 months to do what I knew I had to do.
I dropped more stress, simply disengaged with it.
I dropped ALL gluten, all dairy, forgot about my debts and bills, focused on more health, more recreation, more reflection.
Supplement wise I started folic acid 5mg and a cold sore supplement that included astragalus, zinc, lysine, vitamin C and some CoQ10.
I also know that high estrogen drives reproductive tissue to go hay-wire so started some estrogen clearing supplements and silymarin (to help my liver excrete the extra estrogen).
Vitamin D is important so I had that checked and it was over 100 but I wanted it to be REALLY HIGH (vitamin D activates a cancer surveillance component in the cell membrane wall, so I wanted it to be high). So drinking a glass of wine, with a home made organic meal in the middle of the day, in the sun followed by some reflection became a ritual of sorts.
Things fell into place. I lost 3-4 kg – probably due to folic acid (it can do this for people), I felt less stressed, my income dropped off as I wasn’t working as much but I rationalised this didn’t matter as I was saving my life.
I felt good, slept well and despite my gynaecologist colleague calling me a few times to have a repeat pap to decide whether cone biopsy or LEEP would be necessary.
I reassured him. “I am ok, just give me more time. I am beating this. ” I would say.
I decided a few years ago that taking uteruses out and chopping out body parts didn’t make sense any more. (This is after being an intensive care nurse for YEARS, so I have seen removal of infected organs save lives, but malignancy is different).
These are my personal thoughts but it is somewhat my professional beliefs too.
I strongly believe that the body can unravel what ever state it has got itself into with the right tools and focus, including cancers, auto immune diseases etc. So Chopping out my cervix was not an option for me. I knew I needed to give my body what it needed to heal.
HEALING is such an under utilized approach in medicine.
Allow yourself, allow others to heal.
Give yourself, give others what they need emotionally, physically and spiritually to heal.
Often this means changing the environment that gave it to you/them in the first place .
It means fixing up deficiencies, getting rid of stress (usually due to a values conflict), changing foods, changing habits, changing friends. So much needs to be addressed.
BUT last week when my pap results came back as CLEAR I saluted the stars, my fortune, my specialist, my food, my tenacious belief in myself to do this.
It was a HUGE win for me. I knew I could do it and I did.
Massive relief, big smiles and now I hope I can inspire other women to believe in themselves.
Logically we can reverse or facilitate change if we sit back, gather information about where things went wrong (see specialists, naturopaths, read, ask) but don’t just listen to one opinion.
The human body is a collective being of our thoughts, our food, our body, our nourishment, our being… BEING. And often all these aspects need “coaching” and “healing”.
It is a being thing and at times needs time to heal. Trust this and give your body what it needs and wants. Listen, read, learn, implement.
I am so grateful for my experience and the all-clear and now hope this short blog will inspire others to let themselves heal.